An Embran Love Story

Long ago, when I was a callow and averagely lustful First Year student, I was dispatched to Perth  by the hierarchy of the Uni of Embra Tory Club to pick up a speaker. Obvious choice. I came from Perth and knew where the railway station was and how to get to and from there.

Now, I blog here as a Mackie but that’s only half the story. My other half is MacLeod and I made the mistake of   telling said speaker this. He was an MP and the younger twin of the heir to the Chieftain of Clan MacLeod of MacLeod, Dame Flora. I remembered, too late,  that the whole of the Chieftain’s family were heavily into Moral Re-Armament

For the remainder of the drive to Edinburgh, I was lectured and hectored about my need to stay absolutely pure in thought, word and deed and to try to avoid any carnal thoughts of any sort until I was safely married. Regular cold showers were advised to ensure that I did not stray and shame the good name of the Clan. 

Needless to say, I eventually ignored these admonitions in their entirety but they did put me off for a couple of days. And I am now wondering if I have a Moral Re-Armament Clan relative working in Embra Zoo.

It would seem that our resident pandas have failed to ignite the spark of passion in the brief 36 hour window open to them, despite the best efforts of all concerned. I just can’t help feeling that there might have been an MRA keeper in there sabotaging it all by whispering ‘Don’t do it. You’ll hate yourself in the morning. You hardly know each other. Have you thought about having a cold shower or some nice bamboo instead?’

On the other hand, maybe they’re just true Embrans and are taking their time. There’s always next year. 


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